2016 Presidential Primary: A BuzzFeed Report

2016 Presidential Primary: A BuzzFeed Report

Bimante Marie Stonefeld, BuzzFeed Staff

OMG moment: you guys, Bernie Sandwich is gonna win this thing. As a staunch feminist and fan of Jimmy Fallon and Channing Tatum, this makes me mad. What is happening to this country? I am a reporter for the news, and when I was born in 1998, this country was about News and Gosling and Beards. Now it’s about other beards and different news and some black guy? WTF? I am upset, but my editor said not to write about it in first person. Hillary Cimtoln is the best for women and blacks, basically, tho.

Did u see what Patton Oswalt said? I won’t talk about it much here, but I have another 40-plus articles to go about his lack of chill. He says he’s a staunch progressive, but aside from his words and voting record and twitter account and media presence and actions, all I have to go on is a joke I was offended by as someone who didn’t see the show, and I for one am furious. Eat organic.

The banning of DDT may be liable for the death of 200 million plus people worldwide, but did u hear about what someone on Facebook said about Caitlyn Jenner? I’m anti-pro-life and I think I should be allowed to terminate a pregnancy until the girl Rocco put in me is 18, but that Facebook meme guy should probzazly be executed by hanging by Glorninga Stweimeng and Ruth Baver Gimsferd or whatever. Weeknd?

Did u guys see the season finale of Farbo? OMG moment: when the thing and the thing and the thing and the thing and the —

Politics are so whatever, and the voice of the ppl and the thing; Batman vs. Superman abs; Pandora is murder. Also, like, what about college? It’s expensive, and my parents own ten blocks of Brooklyn, but that doesn’t mean they can pay 4 me 2 go to college, so it’s like even tho Bernie is syng free colge, im like ;’wuit abt hilary and the womyns’ ..

Hay an Kanye wStg saiug th thing wher he sad bill cosbe is nincont mnnkjns nhjk won k.m.ii ui.///

 

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