Sarah Godlin

Sarah Godlin, one of the creators of Savage Henry, lives in the heart of Humboldt County, California. She has a bit of a Napoleon Complex, but all in all is a hell of a gal. She's responsible for the fold-in's, Catty Mean Girl, the Monthly Confessions, The parental Warning, many features and a grip of the other funny that make Savage Henry so great. She also wrangles writers. If you think you're a funny writer, get a hold of her. She can loud whistle, play harmonica and back a trailer into a tight space. She's a lefty and a Clippers fan. She's also a Raiders fan but don't hold that against her, she enjoys winning just as much as the next person. You can follow her on Twitter! twitter.com/bloglin You can send her emails! godlin@savagehenrymagazine.com You can send her presents! http://www.thinkgeek.com/product/f2aa/ 791 8th Street, Suite 5 Arcata, Ca 95521

Funny Things to Say When Someone Trips While Walking

“Why you trippin’?” “See you next fall!” “Logan dies in the end!” “Your mom ate your placenta!” “What’s with the gravitational pull around your facial area in relation to the flat surface you are trying to remain affixed to only with your feet?” “Even in the valley of the shadow of death, two and two do not make six.” “It’s …

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Restaurant Review – Abruzzi – Arcata, California

Why do people do things they know are bad for them? The biology of the human body is a powerful force. It can make people do the exact thing they set out specifically not to do. Is there a real payoff to smoking a cigarette when it is raining outside? Your brain, lungs and frozen fingers say no, but a …

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Book Review: We are Legion, (We are Bob)

We are Legion, (We are Bob) Dennis E. Taylor After reading a painful historical fiction based off the life of Wyatt Earp’s wife (painful because it sucked and I finished it anyway), I thought I’d get back into my personal favorite genre, SciFi/Fantasy. This book is short and sweet. It has everything a historical romantic Western doesn’t: Cryogenics, space travel, …

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Pros and Cons

Things that hallucinogens have ruined for me: Garlic Fries   Things that hallucinogens have made better for me: Carpet Tree trunks My friend River’s door Phish   Things I don’t do anymore because my acute need for control and lack of free time: Hallucinogens   Things I plan to do when I’m 60: Smoking a super cool pipe like Miss …

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Book Review – Fingerprints of the Gods

Graham Hancock lays out an interesting theory based on his research that Antarctica housed an advanced civilization before earth crust displacement moved the continent south. It explains why all cultures have a Great Flood myth and why pyramids spring up in unadvanced cultures.   Homeboy makes a good point. Now excuse me while I roll my eyes at history books …

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Accidental Trip

Like Bugs Bunny, I literally took a wrong turn in Albuquerque, New Mexico. I was trapped in a large parking lot and to turn around I had to pay 5$ to a very serious parking attendant who wasn’t having any of my excuses. It ended up being the parking fee for the Gathering of Nations, the Largest Native American pow-wow …

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I’m Sorry to Hear About Your Mother, What Size Shoes Did She Wear?

The only time trickle down economics actually works is when a wealthy person dies and their children, off being rich somewhere themselves, tell the movers to donate all of their dead parent’s clothing to the Hospice Thrift Shop before they put the house on the market. Hooray! Chances are these wealthy folks visited Ireland at some point and bought a …

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A Kinda Review on Mall Chinese Food

I woke up one morning and discovered that I was the guardian (“please stand over there”) of two tween girls. When I had gone to bed the night before, I was the parent of two adorable girl kids but a comet passed over our house at night and left me with two eye-rolling, opinion-having, hair-brushing extraterrestrials who totally cared what …

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Book Review: Mr. Mercedes – Stephen King

Stephen King can really knock your socks off (like the dead kid in “The Body”). He knows how to write the dark vs light hero cycle and he can do it in his sleep. I think, though, it was a deep coma he was in while he crafted Mr. Mercedes. A retired and overweight detective around Stephen King’s actual age …

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Costco, Tahiti, and American Safety

Costco is the Holy Land of 21st century America. We revere its high-ceilinged isles. We worship at its photo lab and in its optometry section. Its priestesses give us this day our daily yogurt-covered raisins and meatball samples. It is the string that ties America’s middle class together. Yes! My veggie straws are your veggie straws. It is the nice …

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