Savage Henry

The Best Non-Human Drinking Buddies

Andre Parker, contributor I like to drink. It’s that simple. You know what I don’t like? Of course you don’t, FOOL. You don’t know me. You don’t know where I’ve BEEN and what I DO. I’ll tell you what I don’t like. Drinking with other PEOPLE. People suck to drink with. Always putting “limits” on things like when and where …

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Album Review: The Head and the Heart – “Let’s Be Still”

Leah Brzezinski, midwestern music correspondent The Head and the Heart could’ve easily been another tragic flash in the “folk-inspired rock” pan, release a disappointing sophomore album, and begin their slow fade into obscurity. So, way to not fuck it up, guys. Let’s Be Still, released last month on Sub Pop Records, is definitive proof that this once-ragtag bunch of Seattle …

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Album Review: Lee Ranaldo and the Dust – “Last Night on Earth”

Bagel, contributor  On Lee Ranaldo’s second solo offering, he’s accompanied by a backing band. Unfortunately, it feels much like his unimpressive first offering, Between the Times and Tides. Ranaldo’s solo output thus far has lacked the emotional response I’m seeking, and the bold, innovative material that made Sonic Youth’s catalog so essential. The music is just fine. It’s listenable, and …

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Best Places to Use Airplane Bottles to Privately Avoid Public Sobriety

William Toblerone, contributor #1 The Mall: Why not? You can’t be excited to have found yourself at the mall in the first place, so why intensify the displeasure with sobriety? With a cup of booze mixer from the Cinnabon, you’ve got a perfectly legitimate appearance and a mysterious mall smile. You will leave everyone else thinking that you have a …

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Day Drinking Disguised

Lucy Castle, contributor Paper Maybe that really is coffee in that 16 oz. coffee cup that you just bought from the gas station, and maybe you just poured some out and added a healthy dose of Bailey’s or Kahlua or straight-up whiskey to it. At 7 a.m. That 24 oz. fountain drink cup that says “Pepsi” on the side and …

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Whiskey Dickery

Leslie Small, contributor The scene is all too familiar: you in a dimly-lit room with your object of desire. Hanging in the air is the distinct scent of digested alcohol and impending bad decisions. Hands roaming eagerly in unbridled anticipation of kinky sex reserved for booze-filled nights and near-perfect strangers, you’re hoping shit’s going to get weird. Layers of clothing …

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History, Tradition, and the Washington Redskins

Matt Gubser, contributor This Fall, for the 81st consecutive year, the professional football team known as the Redskins will be taking the field. The name has survived a world war, the end of segregation, the Civil Rights movement, and somehow come out the other side wholly intact. Team owner Dan Snyder refuses to even entertain a name change, last month …

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Letter to the Editor #43

I have been reading this magazine for a while. Even though I have yet to find anything of real value in it, I would like to congratulate the lady writers in the ‘Harvest’ issue for outperforming the boys. Perhaps you should consider changing the name to Savage Henrietta. Keep up the good work girls. Kindly, Maria Rojas Sacramento, CA  

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50 Altered States

Andrew Oullette, contributor  This month Savage Henry is all about weed and its legality. Some comics use marijuana to get inspired, but I get my tongue loose before a show with a combination of red wine and Vicodin. Something about an altered state of consciousness helps to blur the line between inappropriate and hilarious; it corrodes inhibitions. Comedy has long been connected to …

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The Ultimate Gamer This month’s review: PlayStation 3 video game console

Robert McManus, contributor Without any Internet connection, or actual video games, this console is pretty much bogus. You can’t even DO anything with it. I connected the PlayStation 3 to my HD television via HDMI cord, and let me tell you, I was bored right out the gate. I was like, “Uh, where’s the fun?” My buddy Wayne Slydell came …

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