Ben’s 10 Volume LXIII: Songs For Wild Animals

I recently spent a month traveling to exotic locations throughout the world to meet and interview some wild animals about what’s been on heavy rotation on their iPods.

Harriet Halibut

The Beatles “Octopus’ Garden”

“I like Ringo’s melody. Every time I end up in an Octopus’ garden I regret it. Those things are weird looking and freak me the fuck out.”

 

Peter Python

Kermit the Frog “It’s Not Easy Being Green”

“Wait! I thought this tune was written about my species. I didn’t realize it was performed by some goddamn felt puppet with balls for eyes.”

 

Pedro Polar Bear

Vanilla Ice “Ice Ice Baby”

“When temperatures rise slightly in the Arctic, all I have to do is put on this number to chill right out.”

 

Pattie Pig

Aerosmith “Pink”

“I bet Steven Tyler is great at cunnilingus with those giant horse lips. Even though his music blows donkey dick, I like this song as I’m a beautiful shade of pink.”

 

Carrie Cockatiel

Lynyrd Skynyrd “Free Bird”

“I’m stuck in a cage all goddamn day, of course I want be free.”

 

Bonnie Baboon

Harry Belafonte “Banana Boat Song (Day-O)”

That Belafonte enjoyed tasty, ripe bananas even more than me. Everytime I hear this cut it gets my monkey nipples rock hard.”

 

Terry Tarantula

James Brown “Say It Loud – I’m Black and I’m Proud”

“The hardest working man in show business had it exactly right. As the ladies tell me, once you go black, you’ll never go back!”

 

Catherine Cat

2 Live Crew “We Want Some Pussy”

“I was just thrilled to hear these Floridian porn rappers wanted to hang with some fine felines like myself.”

 

Debra Deer

The Wallflowers “One Headlight”

“My friends and I have this drinking game where we sit by the side of the highway and wait for cars with one headlight to drive by. Whoever yells “Popeye” first is safe, but everyone else has to down a shot of Jagermesiter.

 

Walter Walrus

Bobby Darin “Splish Splash”

“Yes, I know it’s cheesy, but I just love splashing around in the water, acting like a damn fool. This jam makes me think of Summer.”

 

About Ben Allen

Our music editor Ben Allen was born one stormy evening in a quaint Northern California coastal village. Upon birth he was immediately exposed to the soothing analog sounds of artists such as Fleetwood Mac, The Beatles, Paul Simon, Captain Beefheart and Santana. As the lad grew, so did his appreciation for an assortment of abrasive hard rock. A pubescent flirtation with butt metal was shattered in the early 1990’s by exposure to Nirvana and other so-called “Alternative” bands. While in college, our protagonist became a DJ on a local station, and began work as a freelance music journalist. During this period he became entranced with artists such as Tortoise, Slint, Modest Mouse, Guided By Voices and Pavement. Currently Allen resides in Arcata, CA where he continues to obsess and salivate over new recordings by his favorite artists. He works with music industry people to ensure that Savage Henry’s contributors receive music and other promotional materials. He also writes a silly monthly list titled “Ben’s 10.”

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