Ben’s 10 Volume LXVII: Translated Passive Aggressive Song Titles

Artist: The Beatles
Passive Aggressive Song Title: “Let It Be”

Translation: “Get the Fuck Away From Me Paul, the Band is Over!”

 

Artist: Billy Joel

Passive Aggressive Song Title: “Just The Way You Are”

Translation: “You May Be Butt Ugly, But I Will Look Past That and Stay With You”

 

Artist: The White Stripes

Passive Aggressive Song Title: “You’re Pretty Good Looking (For a Girl)”

Translation: “I’m Gay”

 

Artist: Fleetwood Mac

Passive Aggressive Song Title: “Go Your Own Way”

Translation: “Leave Me Alone Asshole, I’m Getting a Restraining Order!”

 

Artist: Carly Simon

Passive Aggressive Song Title: “You’re So Vain”

Translation: “Just Fuck Off and Die. Please”

 

Artist: Michael Jackson

Passive Aggressive Song Title:”Ben”

Translation:”I Have An Unnatural Sexual Relationship With My Pet Rat”

 

Artist: Tom Petty

Passive Aggressive Song Title: “American Girl”

Translation: “I Hate Immigrants”

 

Artist: Nirvana

Passive Aggressive Song Title: “Come As You Are”

Translation: “It’s Alright To Ejaculate While Wearing That Old Coat”

 

Artist: Bruce Springsteen

Passive Aggressive Song Title: “I’m On Fire”

Translation: “This Gonorrhea is a Bitch!”

Artist: Led Zeppelin

Passive Aggressive Song Title: “Whole Lotta Love”

Translation: “I’m Going to Perform Bizarre Sex Acts on You

 

About Ben Allen

Our music editor Ben Allen was born one stormy evening in a quaint Northern California coastal village. Upon birth he was immediately exposed to the soothing analog sounds of artists such as Fleetwood Mac, The Beatles, Paul Simon, Captain Beefheart and Santana. As the lad grew, so did his appreciation for an assortment of abrasive hard rock. A pubescent flirtation with butt metal was shattered in the early 1990’s by exposure to Nirvana and other so-called “Alternative” bands. While in college, our protagonist became a DJ on a local station, and began work as a freelance music journalist. During this period he became entranced with artists such as Tortoise, Slint, Modest Mouse, Guided By Voices and Pavement. Currently Allen resides in Arcata, CA where he continues to obsess and salivate over new recordings by his favorite artists. He works with music industry people to ensure that Savage Henry’s contributors receive music and other promotional materials. He also writes a silly monthly list titled “Ben’s 10.”

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