Bob Dylan – Christmas in the Heart

The most incredible comedic holiday album of all time is without a doubt Bob Dylan’s Christmas in the Heart. Unfortunately, I don’t think Dylan’s intention was for this to be funny, but it is so bizarre and unlistenable, you’ll quickly find yourself laughing in a maniacal manner.

Christmas in the Heart is a collection of overly-orchestrated cheese-dick holiday classics sung by a guy who sounds like he’s guzzled a bottle of Wild Turkey and chain smoked two packs of Marlboros. The only reasonable explanation of this turd is Dylan’s status as an “Advanced” artist. The Advanced Genius Theory “is a cultural condition in which an Advanced individual creates a piece of art that 99 percent of the population perceives to be bad. However, it is not because the work is flawed, it is because most consumers are not Advanced.” It’s basically a method of understanding and appreciating the least celebrated works by some of the most celebrated artists in pop culture.

Go ahead, try to understand what the hell Dylan is doing here, just don’t be surprised if you don’t get it. The man is Advanced, and you most likely are not.

4 out of 12 cans of PBR

About Ben Allen

Our music editor Ben Allen was born one stormy evening in a quaint Northern California coastal village. Upon birth he was immediately exposed to the soothing analog sounds of artists such as Fleetwood Mac, The Beatles, Paul Simon, Captain Beefheart and Santana. As the lad grew, so did his appreciation for an assortment of abrasive hard rock. A pubescent flirtation with butt metal was shattered in the early 1990’s by exposure to Nirvana and other so-called “Alternative” bands. While in college, our protagonist became a DJ on a local station, and began work as a freelance music journalist. During this period he became entranced with artists such as Tortoise, Slint, Modest Mouse, Guided By Voices and Pavement. Currently Allen resides in Arcata, CA where he continues to obsess and salivate over new recordings by his favorite artists. He works with music industry people to ensure that Savage Henry’s contributors receive music and other promotional materials. He also writes a silly monthly list titled “Ben’s 10.”

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