Is This Breakfast?

Andrea Bartunek, contributor

They say breakfast is the most important meal of the day, because it is. It’s not good to skip it and you have to at least put something in your body. You usually wake up in the morning starving, hungover and reach for the closest form of food. To make this more entertaining, start playing a game called, “Is This Breakfast?” This is where you just say out loud, “Is this breakfast?” and then proceed to eat the fruit from last night’s sangria. The answer to that one is yes. Hey, at least it’s fruit. There’s definitely some nutrition, and not to mention, alcohol, the best breakfast to cure your hangover. Who needs oatmeal when you have fruit soaked in booze? No one. I guess you can eat fruit not soaked in alcohol for breakfast, but there’s no fun in that.

We’ve all been there: you wake up late for work and have to rush out the door, but no way do you have time for eggs and bacon. You do, however, have time for a handful of potato chips and a spoonful of peanut butter. Is that breakfast? Yes, yes it is. A whole cucumber? Is that breakfast? Is it the morning? Then yes, it is breakfast. Tortilla chips and string cheese? Breakfast of champions. Oh, all you have is that pasta you made last night and left on the stove? Well, throw some maple syrup on it, because it’s your breakfast.

Whatever you put in your mouth first thing in the morning can be considered breakfast. Did you accidentally swallow some toothpaste when you were speed-brushing your teeth? That’s your breakfast now. You might be thinking, how am I going to function without the proper breakfast foods in my system? Suck it up; grab that chocolate bar next to your bed. Bonus points if there are nuts in it, because that’s nutritional. You could pick the nuts out and just eat those, but no one has time for that.Your lack of time and energy got you into this breakfast predicament in the first place.

Your body is a temple and you need to trick it into thinking you are eating a suitable breakfast. Remember to ask, “Is this breakfast?” and then announce that whatever it is, is in fact, breakfast. Now, continue your day as if you did not just eat cold pizza at 8 am.

 

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