I’m Sorry to Hear About Your Mother, What Size Shoes Did She Wear?

The only time trickle down economics actually works is when a wealthy person dies and their children, off being rich somewhere themselves, tell the movers to donate all of their dead parent’s clothing to the Hospice Thrift Shop before they put the house on the market. Hooray!

Chances are these wealthy folks visited Ireland at some point and bought a pair of matching Donegal sweaters that never left the closet. $5. Their basic tees were from L.L.Bean and as such are still in great shape and will be forever. $2. If the woman was a shoe collector you will have to wade through the old lady shoes to find the showcase selection of Italian leather that was never worn because of corns/bunions/a decreasing social calendar after Harold died, but find them you will! $6.

It’s nice that the people who cut this couple’s lawn and made this couple’s bread get a crack at some really quality gear, too. Even if the Eau de Age still faintly clings to your new high quality item.

Don’t forget to spread the love when you take the eternal dirt nap! Someone is going to find those Jordans that you kept in the box, be stoked and write a small story about it for a holographic humor magazine.

About Sarah Godlin

Sarah Godlin, one of the creators of Savage Henry, lives in the heart of Humboldt County, California. She has a bit of a Napoleon Complex, but all in all is a hell of a gal. She's responsible for the fold-in's, Catty Mean Girl, the Monthly Confessions, The parental Warning, many features and a grip of the other funny that make Savage Henry so great. She also wrangles writers. If you think you're a funny writer, get a hold of her. She can loud whistle, play harmonica and back a trailer into a tight space. She's a lefty and a Clippers fan. She's also a Raiders fan but don't hold that against her, she enjoys winning just as much as the next person. You can follow her on Twitter! twitter.com/bloglin You can send her emails! godlin@savagehenrymagazine.com You can send her presents! http://www.thinkgeek.com/product/f2aa/ 791 8th Street, Suite 5 Arcata, Ca 95521

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