piZZZa: 21st Century Sleep Aid

Gage Hensley, contributor

 

Ever wonder why they call it a food coma? Or how you can’t seem to connect a restless night with a hearty binge of late-night pie? A new study has been shown to prove that your favorite cheat meal — midnight snack, order-in dinner — is also your new cure for insomnia. Now have the perfect excuse to get extra sauce in you after getting sauced, with a strong argument proving the necessity of a good night’s rest solely relying on a slice of the greatest italian cuisine.

 

So what kind of future does this have in store for us now that the sandman is driving for Domino’s? Well, little Timmy can now put those nightmares away with a personal pan instead of a glass of warm milk. The future is now, and she’s hot and ready. So go down to your local pizzeria and ask their physician what the best toppings for your night’s rest (and what sauce should go with your bread sticks).

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