Tag Archives: #52

Dama/Libra – Claw

Raj Noogmosh, contributor  In 1992, at the height of the alternative music craze, Black Crowes frontman Chris Robinson fired back at critics of his band’s traditional take on rock ‘n’ roll by saying, “It seems you have to play a dead weasel if you want to be considered original today.” It’s ironic that, decades later, Dama/Libra would take that advice …

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What You REALLY Do With a Drunken Sailor

If you meet a sailor and you are not on a boat, chances are that he is drunk. What? How do I know he is a he? Because lady sailors are called “sailorettes” and everyone knows that. Please stop interrupting. Do not attempt to shave his belly with a rusty razor. This is so beyond dumb and very freaking dangerous …

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What the hell is chose your own adventure anyway? Internet Video-Venture Bananaganza!

Kollin Holtz, contributor  Choose your own adventures came about as books intended to get children to read more. They began as bedtime stories to put the inventor, Edward Packard’s, children to sleep. Originally, he told them stories from beginning to end, but soon his creative wellspring ran dry. He resorted to the unthinkable: letting his two children use their imaginations …

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Three Knock Knock Jokes of Varying Quality

Joke 1 First Person: Knock knock. Second Person: Who’s there? First Person: Rachel. Second Person: Rachel who? First Person: Uh… I thought we weren’t supposed to give last names. This… this is the Alcoholics Anonymous meeting, right? Second Person: Yeah, you’re right. That’s true. Come on in. Joke 2 First Person: Knock knock. Second Person: Hu’s there? First Person: Michael …

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“Weird Al” Yankovic – Mandatory Fun

Leah Brzezinski, contributor  Parody is a delicate art, and make no mistake—Weird Al is an undisputed virtuoso, and one of my personal heroes. He truly studies and understands how to replicate every facet of well-known songs before he re-imagines them with new lyrics or in different musical styles. “Foil”  extols the virtues of the beloved sandwich wrap in the style …

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Hey, Guy!

Leslie Small, contributor As a woman who’s had a fair amount of odd jobs, the most adventurous by far has been selling speakers. Not in a store, but out of a van, to strangers we propositioned in parking lots or moving vehicles by yelling, “Hey, guy!” Obviously not the shining star of my resume, but hot damn was every day …

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Get The Mark from Hulu

Zeke Herrera, staff I recently discovered Get The Max From Netflix, the animated algorithm that helps you choose movies when you’re undecided. Max and I became friends. We did what any friends would do, he pitched ideas of things to do and I shot them down. Soon we grew tired of each other, all the things we liked about each …

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Choose Your Own Seat on the Bus

Who you sit next to on your commute to work can set the tone for your entire day. Are you ready to make that decision? THIS IS NOT A FUCKING GAME! IT’S REAL OUT HERE! THIS IS THE BUS! PROTECT YA NECK! Choose wisely. Smartly-dressed businesswoman: Seemly great seat companion, except she is have a loud argument about her divorce …

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You Messed Up

Spencer DeVine, contributor Don’t know how to break it to ya gently, but this here is the end of the line. You obviously chose wrong if ya ended up here. This turn of events doesn’t necessarily speak ill to your personality or life choices but your page-turning choices obviously suck.I mean, don’t take it personally. Seriously, I didn’t do this. …

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Alias – Pitch Black Prism

Willa Kiernan, contributor Three years after his well-received Fever Dream album dropped, Alias, co-founder of Anticon, the independent and unique avant-garde hip hop label, released his latest album, Pitch Black Prism. Previously, Alias had established himself as an MPC-based producer, but this is his first ever software-produced album. Words that I thought of while listening to it included “moody” and …

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