Tag Archives: lists

Ben’s 10 Volume LXXXIV: Trippin’ Out in the Music Industry

RCA releasing Lou Reed’s Metal Machine Music Let’s say you’re an executive at RCA records in the early 1970’s. One of your most lucrative acts (Lou Reed) is riding high on the success of his album Transformer and its David Bowie-produced single “Walk on the Wild Side.” Your man Reed submits his new album featuring nothing but guitar feedback and …

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7 Apps That Someone Needs to Make for Me Right Now

Apps! We like ’em. Heck, we love ’em! And we need us some more. I’ll give all the money I make from this article* to the first person that builds these amazing apps. Apps! – A sleep sounds app that’s just Kevin Costner reading the The Little Prince – An app that translates rappers’ tweets – A photo app that …

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Ben’s 10 Volume LXVVI: The Bold Technological Predictions of Kraftwerk

Between 1975 and 1981, German band Kraftwerk had an impressive run of four concept albums, pioneering electronic music. Their themes centered around technological innovations and their impact on mankind’s future. Here are some of the songs found on those records.   Home Computer (1981) Just imagine a world where computers are as prevalent in our homes as televisions.   Pocket …

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Savage Henry Top 4

Oh yeah, baby. Time for that top four! Let’s count down, and I know you know the words! Haha. Ok, here we go: 4: Joseph Stalin Hitler gets all the press, but what about this guy? Better mustache, better ding-a-ling from what I’ve heard! Haha! YEAH. And HEYELLL YEAAA he loved Satan, too! DOUBLE-DOWN!! 3: Joseph Stalin Hey, how did …

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Things Star Wars Taught Me

Tiffany Greysen, contributor Star Wars taught me I had shitty parents. My parents never took me anywhere and we never did anything fun. There was only one movie that my parents ever took me to see, and that was Return of the Jedi, and only because an uncle was in town to visit. They talked about that movie for years, …

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11 Missed Star Wars Product Tie-Ins

Subway did it. Kraft Macaroni & Cheese did it. Hell, even Crocs did it. So why did so many other companies miss out on Star Wars product tie-ins? Here are a few missed opportunities that could have brought in some major Imperial Credit.   Kashi Admiral Akbar Snackbar A delightful combination of seven whole grains and dried salmon.   Boba …

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Ben’s 10 Volume LXIII: Songs For Wild Animals

I recently spent a month traveling to exotic locations throughout the world to meet and interview some wild animals about what’s been on heavy rotation on their iPods. Harriet Halibut The Beatles “Octopus’ Garden” “I like Ringo’s melody. Every time I end up in an Octopus’ garden I regret it. Those things are weird looking and freak me the fuck …

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A Taxonomy of Animal Smugness

Allison Mick, contributor Here’s a short list of animals organized by how much better than me they think they are. Elephants – least smug animals ever. They just seem super giving and chill, like if an elephant was a human dude he’d eat you out for like half an hour and never once bitch about “his turn”. Hyenas – they’re …

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Failed Breakfast Cereal/Movie Tie-ins

Timothy Paul, contributor The Fast and the Flakiest Saving Private Raisin Diary of a Mad Black Marshmallow Das Fruit Cream of Madea Citizen Grain Dallas Buyers Puffs Chocolate Phillips The Wolf of Puffed Wheat Extremely Loud and Incredibly Crisp True Grits No Cookies for Old Milk Sea Biscuits Four Weddings and Some Mueslix Iron Bran Harry Potter and the Goblet …

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