Tag Archives: Space issue

Bud Time

Matt Redbeard and Evan Vest, contributors Triangle OG is an incredibly potent, super smooth, earthy bud that will send your brain into a whirlwind of pure relaxation with a full spectrum of creative thoughts. Redbeard – Ever had that dream where you’re standing in a crowd and everything is so blissful that you pinch yourself to see if it’s real …

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TheSpaceBarIsArguablyTheMostImportantKeyOnAnyKeyboard

SpencerDevine,contributor LookAtItThisWay:lfYou’reRunningAMarathon,DoYouJustKeepRunningAllTheWayThroughOrDoYouStopAndRestLikeSomeoneWhoIsntAMachine?ItsTheSherbertPalletCleanserAfterAFancyMealWithYourFamily,TheBitThatGetsAllThoseOtherComplicatedFlavorsOutOfYourBrain,AFlavorReprieveIfYouWill.NowThisIsntToDiminishTheValueOfEveryKeyOtherThanTheSpaceBar,YouCantHaveThatPalleteCleanserWithoutTheMeal,AndPointedlyYouAlsoCannotReallyHaveTheSorbetAsTheEntireMealEither,You’dStarve.ThereIsAMixtureOfEmotionsTowardsTheSpaceBar,ACuriousBlendOfReverenceAndFearOfAbandonment,SimilarToAPeoples’RelationshipWithAnAngryGod.WhereDoesTheFearComeFromYouAsk?SomeScholarsTheorizePerhapsThatItAllDrawsFromADeep-SeededCoreOfSemamticClaustrophobia. SureItsNotRealClaustrophobiaButBeingADoctorIsHardAndTheDoctorsDeserveALittleBitOfLeewayWhenProvidingPivotalEvidenceInAnExperimentalFieldSuchAsWordScience.OnTheFlipSideOfThisSocietalConcernIsItsOppositeAffliction,WhichDealsWithTheOverabundanceOfSpaceRatherThanItsLimitation.”InSpaceNoOneCanHearYouScream,”IsATerrifyingSayingBecauseItEmphacizesAPrimalFearOfLonelinessAndVunerabilityInTheFaceOfAll-EncompassingEmptiness.SpaceSeemsLimitless,AndToBeLostInTheMiddleIsLikeAFlyBeingDroppedIntoAMassiveInkWellOnlyToBeSwallowedUpByItsPowerfulDarkness.TheWordsWhichProvideContextForTheSpaceBarInThisScenarioAreTheBitsOfAnInterstellarVoyageThatKeepYaSane:Crewmembers,CleverRobots,AndWhateverOtherMetaphorsKeepSomeoneSaneOutsideTheOzoneLayer.ItsTheDependenceThatMustBeBrokenBeforeTheObsessionModernPeopleHaveEvolvedTowardsTheSpaceBarCanTransformIntoAGlimmerOfHealthyGrammaticalControl.TheSuggestionOfScientificExpertsIsToTakeTheInitiativeAndSay”BuzzOff”ToWhoeverMakesTheRules.YouAreTheMasterOfYourOwnLanguage,NoMatterIfYouFeelEnclosedByOrOverwhelminglyFreeOfTheSpaceBarsGuidanceAndPower:YouCreateYourOwnSpaceTheRestIsJustATool.   @SpencerTDevine

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Space Explained

Isn’t space confusing? A lot of so-called “scientists” and “teachers” try to explain space to us but we all know they’re lying. I’m tired of all their bullshit. So finally, as the only person who truly understands space, I will explain it to you. So buckle up (if you’re reading this while driving) put your learning shoes on (unless you …

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If We Never Landed on the Moon

Zeke Herrera and Chris Durant, staff We hear a lot of talk about Neil Aldrin punching out some guy who was all yelling at him about the Moon Landing being fake and shot by Francis Ford Coppola on the set of Star Wars or something. Well that ne’er-do-well is a really piece of shit, and stupid to boot, ‘cause if …

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The Most Spacey – The David Huntsberger Interview

If you missed David Huntsberger’s recent show at Humbrews in Arcata, CA, you missed out. He’s funny, but he’s not just trying to make you laugh. He’s also trying to make you think about the big picture and blow your mind while doing it. Big ideas have been the through line of Huntsberger’s career, which has included the popular science …

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Restaurant Review – Pizza My Heart, Santa Cruz

You know those days when you drink on the beach all day, check out a theme park and then bounce around a new city going from dispensary to dispensary? And then you’re all like, dang, I can really stand to eat. If you’re in Santa Cruz, and near a Pizza My Heart, this is the place for you. Large slices, …

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