The Wisdom of Dick Vitale

The venerable Dick Vitale, ex-college coach and current color analyst luminary, is nearly 200 years old. What have we learned from this pillar of basketball industry in the past century of televised collegiate hoops?

— Yeah, baby!

— Slam-a-lama-ding-dong!

— Diaper dandy, gimme some candy!

— Wacka-lacka-boogie-baloom!

— Call a roofer, ‘cuz the ceiling just caved in, baby!

— I before E, except after C, baby!

— You gotta be kiddin’ me!

— Are you serious? Dammit! Crap!

— Slam dunker, junker in the trunker, gimme some Lutefisk, baby!

— Take me to the hoosegow, baby — I just committed grand pants dumpage, baby!

— Baby, I just put a baby in the trash, baby! Baby!

— Call the FBI, I’m the Boston Marathon Bomber, baby!

— Baby baby baby baby baby baby baby —

— A publicly elected official cannot have the best interests of his or her constituents in mind while beholden to the corporations who got him or her into office, baby!

— Listen, baby, I’m sorry! OK? I’m sorry, baby! I didn’t plan on it happening, baby! I know it’s your sister… I’m — I’m sorry, baby. That’s all I can say, ok? OHHHHHH did you see that dunk-a-lunk by the dookies, baby? Yabadaba-dingooooooo!

About Zack Newkirk


Check Also

An Article Only About Pot And Marijuana And Nothing Else At All

Tiffany Greysen, contributor   In this article I’m going to talk about smoking pot and …